This year has been an extremely hard one for me emotionally and spiritually. Lately I've been dealing with Faith. I'm not going to say I doubt God, but at times my faith waivers, more often than none. I look at things around me and I often wonder when my time will be. What's amazing is God reaffirms and confirms things through non ordinary sources. Like I said God has been really dealing with me on faith. I trust God, but many times when I don't see things happen when I feel like they should, when I feel like I've put ALL my faith and trust in God and the outcome isn't what I expect I become disappointed and I begin to doubt and lose faith.
Ok so I've been praying for alot of things to happen, in my life. But it's like the more I pray the more, nothing happens (It Usually happens like that, LOL) but in the last two weeks everything I've been praying about God has been reconfirming in very nontraditional ways. Ok so everyone who knows me KNOWS I LOVE me some DAVID BANNER, I mean I think Lavell Crump (his birth name)is an amazing man. (Before you ask NO I have not had the pleasure in meeting him) LOL but from what I see and what I've read he's amazing. Sorry I get excited when I talk about him. Ne ways back to the topic at hand. I recently came across an article about him in "The Clarion - Ledger : Mississippi's News Source" The article was written back in 2003. In the article it tells his amazing story about how he made it to where he is now. I've heard this story a million times but this time a few things stuck out that hit home for me. It wasn't the journey he went on to get to where he is but his faith he had while going through it.
While in Birmingham, Alabama, his van was stolen, now if you know the story, this van and everything inside of the van was all he had left to his name. Being a man and a man with street smarts, when he found out his van was stolen he was ready to raise all "holy hell" (oxymoron, LOL) However instead of following his first mind he called his mother... "She prayed and she reminded him that God's blessings come in strange packages sometimes" When he told his story one more thing stuck out to me in the interview David Banner said; "God said 'I'm gonna strip you of everything to see if you're worthy of the blessings that I'm gonna send your way. And if you believe in me and stay constant to my will, then I'll give you everything you want 10, 20, 30-fold"(Billy Watkins, 2003).
Like I said God reaffirms and confirms in very nontraditional ways. After reading this interview about 10 times okay maybe not 10 but after reading this interview a few time, I begin to cry. I cried because just that day my faith had been tested in fact all year my faith has been tested by God.I've lost so many people that I believed would be in my life forever, I've been placed in positions where God made me choose Him or Me. But like David Banner said God will strip you of everything just to see if you will remain constant to his will and be worthy of what God has in store for you.
To further reconfirm this today I went to church, and the sermon series is called "Expecting the unexpected" Many times we look at our circumstances and we often think we're not deserving of more. What I've learned today is you get what you expect. When you expect more you get more. You should expect great things. When God's favor is among us things don't come easy. When God is getting ready to bless you that's when it seems like the Devil goes on a full out war. Look at David Banner's story right before he received his record deal his van was stolen, only leaving him with the clothes on his back. But yet he kept his faith even when it seemed like he had lost it all and it wasn't going to get any better he believed in God and stayed walking by faith, and because he did,God has tremendously blessed him and the blessings continue to pour out.
So like I said earlier God has reaffirmed and confirmed himself to me through nontraditional and traditional ways. I'm thankful for God showing me that staying constant to his will has an amazing payoff in the long run. God is going to bless the least of those, we have to stop looking at our circumstances and wonder how or why or even if we're deserving of the blessings that God has in store. But instead we need to believe that I am worthy of ALL God has for me and that if I just walk in faith that God will give us the desires of our hearts and than some.
So today Ladies and Gent's I'm expecting the unexpected and staying constant to his will because I know that God isn't through with me yet. I'm walking into my season... *besos*
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